Carnation Milk is the best in the land;
Here I sit with a can in my hand—
No tits to pull, no hay to pitch,
You just punch a hole in the son of a bitch.
— Anonymous
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Carnation Milk
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ROTFL!
I always heard the second and third lines as:
Sits on the shelf in a red-and-white can…
No shit to shovel, no teats to pinch…
This is the original poem circa early 1900’s. The one posted on other sites is a copy, fake or plagerized..it is your choice. Interesting that this poem was around for 30+ yrs when the plagerized one won a contest.
I am 71 and the verson I heard goes, Carnation milk is the best of all, it comes in a can large or small, no tits to pull no hay to pitch just jab a hole in sonofbitch !
Your bechemel your teling evey one abouy is a bechemel not eh carnation cream its already been envented so come up with a new usless idea you low life million air americans f-you lmaoo
Lmaoooo f – you carnation of other products made in a can make something reall organic or freshly grown ..advertising isn’t. Yiur forteh ethier
Niether is my english
The version I know is:
I like Carnation best of all
No tit to pull, no shit to haul.
No shit to haul, no hay to pitch.
Just poke a hole in the son of a bitch.
My grandmother entered me in a cutest kid contest in 1950 that I believe was promoted on Burns and Allen TV show..my grandma always said I won the contest because I was raised on carnation milk and it gave me rosie cheeks.
Anyway she said the prize was $500.
and just trying to find out the whole story..thanks in advance for your time
I was a mailman in Baldwin Park California years ago , and a lady on my route told me it was HER that came up with that jingle —- she got a visit from a company representative and he explained to get that her jingle was #1 with the judges of the contest, but obviously they couldn’t use it in a public forum. They?awarded her a small sum for her effort and a thank you from the judges !!!
I first read this poem in David Ogilvy’s book Confesions of a
advertising man. Many years later I read about its origin in
Agnes Cleveland’s biography No life for a lady.
I just heard a variation of this poem for the first time, I did not know about the poem before this variation:
Carnation Milk, the best in the land
That comes to you in a red and white can.
No tits to pinch, no chips to pitch
Just pop two holes in the son of a bitch
My name is Rich Grable and my family, Grable family has always had some jokes to tell and as a kid I can remember my dad “Fat Grable” telling this one:
Carnation milk I think his Grand, the best there is in this land,
No tits to pull,
No shit to pitch,
Just poke a hole in the son of a bitch*